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YEAR OF THE COUNTERSTORY: PROFILES IN STRENGTH
MEN OF STRENGTH GALLERY
(listed in alphabetical order)
BILL T. ARMALINE Submitted by Nicole Steward. Why Nicole would like to honor Bill: "My fiancé Bill is a 'typical' man who not only supports my work (SA Coalition), but enlightens me on feminism, anti-racism work, and social justice. He is my partner in everything from housework to activism. He shows physcial strength when he needs to, but never at the expense of others. If every man were like him, violence against women wouldn't exist."
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TRAVIS S. ATKINS Submitted by Derrick Barrow. Why Derrick would like to honor Travis: " Travis is a 19 year old male that is very much is touch with every aspect of his life and feelings. His divine upbringing has afforded him the ability to love all races, genders, preferences, qualities and/or the lack thereof without ever wavering from his positive outlook on humanity, mankind, and life. For this he is certainly due much honor." Submitted November 30, 2005
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MARK BERGERON-NAPER Submitted by Janice Mirabassi, and Colleagues. Why Janice and her colleagues would like to honor Mark: " Mark Bergeron-Naper is extraordinarily committed to the concept of healthy, non-violent behavior among men. As a staff member of the Violence Prevention & Intervention Services team at the Massachusetts Department of Public Health, he works to change social norms that foster sexual violence, to encourage a climate where sexual assault is not tolerated, and to promote and enhance effective and accessible services for all survivors of sexual assault. Mark maintains a human rights-focused attitude that is respectful of every individual." Submitted October 12, 2004.
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CHRIS BRAND Submitted by Karen Brand. Why Karen would like to honor Chris: " I honored Chris 3 years ago and recently he renewed my admiration so I honor him again. He continues to grow as a "man of strength" and is a good forecast for the future of humanity."
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HONORALBE ADOLFO CARRION, JR., BX BOROUGH PRESIDENT Submitted by Melissa Cebollero. Why Melissa would like to honor Adolfo: "Since becoming Bx Borough President in Jan of 2002, Borough President Carrion has made combating domestic violence a focus of his administration. Whether it is by applying for and administering federal grants (in partnership with the Bronx District Attorney's Office, Jewish Board of Family and Children's Services, Sanctuary for Families, Violence Intervention Program,etc)to help fund the battle against abuse or its funding and sponsoring public events (DiVA Spa and DiVA Talk) for the 1.4 constituients of the Bronx, President Carrion has stood up as a male elected official to ask that all men take responsibility for their actions."
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HARRY CASH, III Submitted by Melody Bailey. Why Melody would like to honor Harry: "I would like to honor Harry for the work that he has done in the Memphis Community through the Sexual Assualt Resource Center. He has talked to young girls throughout the Memphis area about protecting themselves from sexual assaults. He is a strong, caring, and thoughtful person who truly cares about people."
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CURRY CHAMBERS Submitted by Jessica F. Why Jessica would like to honor Curry: "I would like to make an announcment of hour to my best friend John Curry Chambers for being able to be proud of who he is and not expressing his masculinity in any harmful or abusive way and realizing how powerful his inner strength is versus his physical strength as a male which I believe makes him different."
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DAVID CHRISTIE Submitted by Ross. Why Ross would like to honor David: "For the compassion and time you had for me. For the image you have shown me. For your patience and understanding. I thank you. "
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DON COLWELL Submitted by Cindy Colwell. Why Cindy would like to honor Don: "I would like to honor Don for several reasons. First, he workds as a volunteer advocate with victims of sexual assault and violence. Second, he has worked with the Girl Scouts for over 10 years as a co-leader with 3 troops. Lastly, Don made a wonderful example for our three daughters in demonstrating respect and non-violence in relationships between men and women."
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GREG COX Submitted by Niovonni. Why Niovonni would like to honor Greg: "He is an excellent role model to his children. He treats women as equal and is not afraid to stand up for his belief system to fellow men. He also volunteers at the local shelter and has taught self defense courses to women."
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JOHN M. DAVIS Submitted by Jamie Davis. Why Jamie would like to honor John: "I am an advocate for victims of domestic violence and my husbband, John, is my emotional support system. He gives donations of his time and money and is honored to share his time with my personal cause to end domestic violence."
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WILLIAM DURYEA Submitted by Ariella. Why Ariella would like to honor William: " He was always a strong, caring man, and he has a very knightly quality about him. He always treated gently, and when passion spoke, he answered softly."
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RANDY EDGINGTON Submitted by Delayna. Why Delayna would like to honor Randy: "Randy is a devoted father who has taught his four children ( 3 girls and 1 boy) how to avoid rape and that violence is not the way to solve problems. He believes that life is important and you should not throw it away."
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TOM ERLINBAUGH Submitted by Randa Harvey. "As a survivor of domestic violence, who has gone on to advocate for other survivors through my work at Shelter Inc. in Oscoda Michigan, it sometimes was difficult to remember that there are good men in the world, men who are kind and gentle, and compassionate towards others. Tom's stregnth comes not from dominating others by brute force, or intimidation, but through his calm and constant presence, his gentle manner, and his accepting nature-whether he is driving a teen to work just around the corner, or to a theatre rehearsal in the next town, from supervising youth events, to baking beans for a fund-raiser, Tom is the definition of everything a "real man" can be."
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"HODDY" FINNEGAN Submitted by Gerry Joe Capone. Why Gerry would like to honor "Hoddy": ""Hoddy" Finnegan, my uncle, was incredibly un-male. He married late to a tall, successful woman to whom he was a true partner. (no children). In an extended family of military men, he was mild mannered, reserved and quiet, and joined no male circles. Controlling moods, anger, ego, heroisms and other masculine triatis were clearly foreign to him. And to boot, he was obviously comfortable with all this--which made him an alternative model to me."
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JOHN FLETCHER GEORGE Submitted by Victoria Newhouse. Why Victoria would like to honor John: "My Grandfather is the truest example of a what a man should be. He is involved in his community, church, and family. He has been with my Grandmother for 50 years and through all their differences he has maintained a level of respect for her that I would give a lung for."
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BRYANT GILES Submitted by Edith A. Giles. Why Edith would like to honor Bryant: "He's a very supportive brother, a loving husband, and a doting father to his five children."
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TREVOR GREEN Submitted by Melissa Yeck. Why Melissa would like to honor Trevor: "Trevor was recently the victim of a drug induced sexual assault by other males. He has relied on God to help him through this and has shown tremendous courage in trying to move forward."
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MARQUES GRUNDY Submitted by Tonette Sivells. Why Tonette would like to honor Marques: "Marques works at a program for young mothers as the educational coordinator. His interaction with the young women helps to show them that there are honest, decent, and respectful African-American men to be found out here. He often goes above and beyond his job responsibilities to provide support for the young women. Seeing the turmoil in these women's lives he began bringing in support services to help these young women build up their self-esteem to bring about the realization that they can do whatever they want in life. He believes that this will stop the cycle of poverty and teen pregnancy. He is an example for African-American men."
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FATHER HUBERT HALFMANN Submitted by Suzanne McGann. Why Suzanne would like to honor Father Halfmann: "Fr. Halfmann was a very important part of our family. Most important to us was that he was a man of God. The example that he showed to our five children was one of a great love for each other and for life. He never judged anyone and accepted everyone as they were. The joy that he brought into our lives will live with us always."
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NICK HALL Submitted by Catharine Neike. Why Catharine would like to honor Anison: "Every time I converse with this man who treats me with respect and care I get a guager for how I SHOULD be treated. As a survivor of childhood rape myself I have a lot of difficulties with relating to the opposite sex but Nick is one of the very important people in my life who can 'undo' all that the perpetrator said and did to me."
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ANSON HAMILTON Submitted by Laetitia. Why Laetitia would like to honor Anson: "He is the first man I have met who never seems to look at me as a woman but simply a individual. When he has kids he wants to stay home and look after them while his partner goes to work."
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JOSHUA HARRIS Submitted by Chris. Why Chris would like to honor Joshua: "He writes about how men should be respectable, non-perverse and equal to women. I hope his book shows lot of people the same thing."
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MARQUIS HAWKINS Submitted by Malinda Cowles. Why Malinda would like to honor Marquis: "Marquis is a student at IUP. He has worked on our campus to address issues of violence against women. This year he took on the added responsibility of organizing the Take Back the Night march. He paid special attention to providing an opportunity for both men and women to speak about the impact of violence against women has had on their lives. Many men joined women in making powerful statements about the impact this violence has had on their lives and the responsibility all men have can have in preventing it."
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DANNY L. HIGHTOWER Submitted by Mary Anne Hightower. Why Mary Anne would like to honor Danny: "This is my husband of nearly 28 years. He has always treated me with love and respect and helps me cope with all the pressures of life."
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BRIAN R. HOOD Submitted by Susheela Varky. Why Susheela would like to honor Brian: "My husband is, quite simply, the strongest man I know. He has transformed the pain he knew during childhood into power and gentleness to help others. He embodies the "counterstory" as a 6'3" 212-pound former professional athlete who enjoys working out just as much as improving his calligraphy and drawing firetrucks for his son to color. In his professional career, he has prosecuted men who have beaten and sexually abused their wives, girlfriends and/or children. In his personal life, he is a model husband and father whose love for me and his children knows no bounds. He exhibits this love in romantic and sentimental ways such as when he painted and Fed Exed puzzle pieces to me that read "Brian Loves Susheela." Thank you for this opportunity to honor my own personal Man of Strength."
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EDWARD HOYT Submitted by Laurie Hoyt. Why Laurie would like to honor Edward: "I would like to honor my Dad because he is a wonderful man. He raised five daughters and he taught each and everyone of us that we could do anything that we wanted and that we are equals to men."
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IGOR JAREMCHUK Submitted by Lois Shippen. Why Lois would like to honor Igor: "His strength lies in the compassion for women."
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JEAN-LUC Submitted by Karen. Why Karen would like to honor Jean-Luc: "He is constantly questioning the status quo."
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STEVE J. Submitted by Donna. Why Donna would like to honor Steve: "Steve fully supports the work I do (DV agency) and sees it as another way that together we are making a better world for our two daughters. He embraces his role as a father of two girls and as a coach of their sports teams. Steve believes in women and girls and respectfully confronts those who are not."
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CJ JIM Submitted by Aleticia Tijerina. Why Altecia would like to honor CJ Jim: "CJ is a 15 year old football player and ceremonial dancer. He is stopped by others in school and told that he is one of the kindest boys in school. Young women tell me that CJ listens to them and rarely interrupts except to encourage them to make good decisions."
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PATRICK JORDON Submitted by Stephanie Sklar. Why Stephanie would like to honor Patrick: "Patrick has been a tireless advocate for ending violence family violence both in his professional work as Director of Community Development for United Way, but also as a volunteer and Founding Member Tucson Men Against Domestic Violence and the Men's Anti-violence Partnership of Southern Arizona, a program of the Southern Arizona Center Against Sexual Assault."
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JUSTIN Submitted by Tierra. Why Tierra would like to honor Justin: "i would like to honor justin b/c he is the boy of my life my love and he is so sweet and kind to me."
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CHRIS KALLMYER Submitted by Heather Muszynski. Why Heather would like to honor Chris: "When I first began dating Chris a year and a half ago I told him I was a rape victim. Instead of running away like many 18 year olds might have, he stuck by me - He helped me get rid of my nightmares, I no longer shake uncontrollably when we're close, and he's fully supported me as I've become a active in trying to stop sexual violence against men and women. He was patient, loving, and understanding. However, most importantly, he was willing to learn and I know that now there is one more man who exists who can and is helping to end violence against women."
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ROD KASKALLA Submitted by Diane Miether. Why Diane would like to honor Rod: "Rod has worked as a co-facilitator for the abusers' re-education groups that are part of the services provided by the Eight Northern Indian Pueblos Council PeaceKeepers Program in New Mexico for a number of years. In this position and also in his personal life, he works with and models for other men a respectful and honoring way for men to be with women - a non-violent way for men to be with women." Submitted October 18, 2004.
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KEELAN KING Submitted by Majorie Lee. Why Majorie would like to honor Keelan: " I would like to honor my brother for standing up and coming forward with his rape story. He was raped 3 weeks ago and he came forward with his story. I just wanted to say stay stong and keep hope alive."
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TREVON KING Submitted by Majorie Lee Why Majorie would like to honor Trevon: "I just wanted to honor my brother for coming forward with his rape story. He was raped and I just wanted to say stay strong and keep hope alive."
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CHRISTOPHER KNIGHT Submitted by Leslie Hopper. Why Leslie would like to honor Christopher: "Christopher is a man with so much respect for women. That is his heart- caring for their needs as well as he can. Christopher has helped me in dealing with my own case of sexual assault and is dedicated to making a difference for the lives of women."
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JEFF LAUTERER Submitted by Sally Puleo. Why Sally would like to honor Jeff: "Jeff honors the women in his life by treating them respectfully, listening to them, and learning from them. He has made every effort to learn about, understand, and speak out against violence against women. As an advocate for survivors of DV/SA, I count on Jeff to be an ally, and he has supported me personally in countless ways while I do this work."
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JEFF LAUTERER Submitted by Morgan. Why Morgan would like to honor Jeff: "I would like to honor Jeff because he is using his strengths to take care of women and girls."
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MARC LEWIS Submitted by Mallory Shear. Why Mallory would like to honor Marc: " Marc saved my life, literally. He is a strong advocate for women's rights and works constantly to encourage his fraternity's role in preventing gender violence. He listens. Marc is truely a strong man and knowing him has made me realize just what that really means." Submitted: October 25, 2004
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OMAR LIMA Submitted by Jeannette Disla. Why Jeannette would like to honor Omar: "You have helped see the truth in a world of lives and have shielded me from the misconceptions of love. You have redefined for me the true meaning of a partnership."
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JOHN MICHEAL MATA Submitted by Marisela Mata. Why Marisela would like to honor John: "I just had the talk with my 10 year old son about rape, and he responed with educating he fellow classmates."
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PAUL MONTALVO Submitted by Carrie Warf & Colleagues. Why Carrie would like to honor Paul: "Paul came to our organization thinking he was going to fix computers. That was 2 years ago. Now he is trying to create a group of well meaning men to speak out against the violence men commit against women. He continuously challenges himself to be concious of the privileges he enjoys as a man so that he doesn't abuse them but in fact uses them to further the struggle to end oppression."
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BILL MCGANN Submitted by Patrick McGann. Why Patrick would like to honor Bill: "My father always struck me as a man pretty set in his traditionally masculine ways, so when I indicated to him I wanted a closer relationship, I didn't have high hopes. But we now talk and share in ways I never expected and my respect for him has gotten much deeper."
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MIGUEL Submitted by Eden. Why Eden would like to honor Miguel: I want to thank Miguel because he has always been supportive of every decision that I've made and he is willing to help me through every hard time I encounter. He means more than the universe to me and I only hope I can be able to repay him someday!
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STEPHEN MILLER Submitted by Melissa Jones. Why Melissa would like to honor Stephen: "I want to thank Stephen is a 25 year old man who lives consciously. By doing so, he inspires others with a more clouded view to see clearly...to see with eyes that look into the spirit of Woman, not at her. Stephen isn't afraid to speak out against the objectification and degradation of women by the media, and by society as a whole. For this, I commend and thank him."
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GEORGE O. MUMMERT. Submitted by Pamela Newman. Why Pamela would like to honor George: "I am a female survivor of sexual crime and George made me aware that, 'Where I've been doesn't define who I am or where I'm going.' Non-traditional and aware of women's issues, he raised me to a higher place intimately and raises his 3 children wisely and progressively. "
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DEREK LAMONT SMITH, JR. Submitted by Donna Purchase. Why Donna would like to honor Derek: "I would like to honor my grandson Derek for his great spirit and love of life. Derek is a baby whisperer..all babies love him. No matter what he is doing, playing basketball, PS2 etc. he will stop to comfort a crying baby and they just melt into him. He has endless patience with little ones, will hold them, feed them and protect them. At 11 years old - he is a black belt that likes to cook. He understands his strenghth and uses it to make the world a better place. "
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JOSHUA O'DONNELL Submitted by Delvin O'Donnell. Why Delvin would like to honor Joshua: " My brother, my best friend. A man who uses his strength to counter the violence I have experienced in my life by becoming an active feminist, a man against violence on his campus, and an ally to all the women affected by sexual violence, and all the men attempting to break the mold of masculinity. All my love to my brother, the strongest man I know."
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ODUNMORAYO OGUNFIDITIMI Submitted by Kelly Hart. Why Kelly would like to honor Odunmorayo: "Momo, as he is commonly known, is a man of incredible strength, compassion, and giving. He gives rides to the elderly; he mentors young boys and men in his studio - IGIT Recording Studios, and is an amazingly dedicated godfather to his two young goddaughters."
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RANDY PARKS Submitted by Robin Stein. Why Robin would like to honor Randy: "In the chicago-land area, Randy has made his commitment to ending violence against women and girls a reality. He has begun the group MENsch - Men for Shalom in the Community and Home, a group of Jewish male professionals dedicated to combatting violence in our society. Those of us working closely with Randy honor his commitment to ensuring that domestic violence is not just a woman's issue. We value and respect the work that is being done by MENsch in our community!"
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RICHARD PROPES Submitted by Michie Sebree. Why Michie would like to honor Richard: "Richard has been actively speaking out against child abuse, domestic abuse, and sexual violence since 1989 when he started the "Tenderness Tour" and rode over 1,000 miles in his wheelchair to raise awareness on child abuse issues. He's now rode over 3,000 miles in his wheelchair, donated over $100,000 to violence prevention organizations, and continues speaking, at no charge, to school, churches, and community leaders."
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MIKE AND RAYMOND Submitted by Karen Brand. Why Karen would like to honor Mike and Raymond: "Mike and Raymond are friends with my daughter. They happily agreed to make costumes and wear them in a local christmas parade in order to represent young men opposed to violence against women. They will be walking with us for a new women's shelter in our community called "Some of My Best Friends."
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DENNIS REYNOLDS Submitted by Angel Hill. Why Angel would like to honor Dennis: " Dennis has taken it upon himself to fight rape. As student activities coordinator for a community college, he takes every effort to bring the subject to light. He also volunteers his time to help the cause."
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JAMES ROMAN Submitted by Barbara Cyr-Roman. Why Barbara would like to honor James: "Jim definitely does not let a box define him. Whether he is fighting against sexual harassment in his workplace or spending time with his daughter, his beliefs, actions and words embody non-violence and respect for all women."
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DON ROSEDALE Submitted by Katie Rosedale. Why Katie would like to honor Don: "My father has been an incredible support to me in healing from being raped when I was in high school. Recently, he donated a lot of time and money to help me create a 4th of July float for the local rape crisis center where I volunteer. Not only did he help build it, he walked the parade route with me, and has since come to me with many other outreach ideas for the center." Submitted: October 11th, 2004
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MATTHEW A. ROSS Submitted by Corinna Ross. Why Corinna would like to honor Matthew: "My husband of 7 months, Matthew, is the most respectful and kind men I have ever known. He has been mistreated throughout his life by women and other loved ones and still manages to maintain a sense of gentle chivalry and honor. He has helped me to see my own value and encourage me to be stronger and see myself as a beautiful woman--something I have never been able to see-- and he never gives up. He has also helped and respected other women who have been abused, physically and sexually, and has taught self-defense classes for women. He will be a wonderful role-model for our first child when he/she is born."
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JEREMY RUIZ Submitted by Melissa Webb. Why Melissa would like to honor Jeremy: "Jeremy is a man who is unafraid of vulnerability, his own or mine. He truly understands and respects women. It takes such courage to step outside of machismo acculturation; his courage is astounding to me."
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JAMES SHANNON Submitted by Angela Slack. Why Angela would like to honor James: "At first glance you would think James is a man's man; he is a police officer who has just re-enlisted in the Army reserves. He is a wonderful, caring, compassionate, supportive person who has supported me and the work I do (domestic violence agency) to the extreme. He has defended me to his superiors and to his buddies and fixes the toilets in our shelter and fixes cars for the women I serve."
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SHEVY Submitted by Penny G. Miller. Why Penny would like to honor Shevy: "Shevy treats women like a flower. Gentle and needing much tlc and always some careful attention to their roots. His admiration for women, and respect should be admired."
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CHAD SNIFFEN Submitted by Tina Tarin. Why Tina would like to honor Chad: " Chad should be honored for the many hours of volunteer work that he does answering the phone for our local rape crisis center, teaching women's self-defense classes and always providing a true role models of what a "Man of Strength" should be." Submitted: October 26, 2004
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PASTOR JOHN STEITZ Submitted by Sharon Davidheiser. Why Sharon would like to honor Pastor John: " In this past year I faced an abusive relationship and the painful recalled memories of sexual assaults that started at age 12. Pastor John has encouraged me to face my memories of horrible asaults and empowered me to confront my current abuse. He is a tireless advocate for women's rights, and is devoted to transforming our current rape culture through education and resocialization of our young men." Submitted October 13, 2004.
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THOMAS MACKENZIE STRAIN Submitted by Peg Strain. Why Peg would like to honor Thomas: "Tom is my brother who died in April 2004. Tom was an engaging person who cultivated a huge variety of friends and mentored many people through his work as a counsler, social worker, and 12-step participant for years and years. There were possibly 400-500 friends at his memorial and most felt he influenced their lives with a tremendous, positive grace. He was the person who taught me to be a feminist. He was a man who lived a truely decent life dedicated to other people."
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TARIQ Submitted by Anna. Why Anna would like to honor Tariq: "He has cried for the abuse I experienced in the past. He is the strongest person I know, while also being the gentlest and most caring. He would never use his strength to hurt."
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LEO JAMES TERRELL Submitted by Sylvia Pettaway. Why Sylvia would like to honor Leo: "I would like to honor leo james terrell because he has great respect for all women."
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ARTURO TREVIZO Submitted by Melissa. Why Melissa would like to honor Arturo: " For my husband, who knows his strength and uses it to cherish me and all women. He is a man who wants to know how he can make a difference and tries his best to set a good example for all men. He is a role model to his younger brother and to men with no positive examples. Thank you Lito." Submitted: October 27, 2004.
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SAM UPTON Submitted by Meg Kuhner. Why Meg would like to honor Sam: "My 27-year-old son, Sam, helped to care for his elderly grandfather both emotionally and physically for the last 18 months of his dear Papa's life. Their love was evident and inspiring to everybody around them both."
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WADE Submitted by Keri. Why Keri would like to honor Wade: "I would like to honor him for being such a wonderful person. During parties he cuts off my alcohol intake, he doesn't allow me to smoke, and he doesn't take advantage of me or the other girls at the parties. I care for and trust him greatly for this.
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BRANDON WALKER Submitted by Tuval Dinner. Why Tuval would like to honor Brandon: "Brandon joined our youth group 2 years ago with a lot of stereotypical characteristics of a 16yr old male. Over the last couple of years he has demonstrated a willingness to challenge his own ideas about gender and sexuality and has also begun to challenge those around him who act in hurtful ways. Brandon continues to learn and grow and inspire others. He also shares his vision of a better world with others using his incredible rapping skills. He volunteers and performs with Project Respect (www.yesmeansyes.com) and has provided emotional support for friends and family who are dealing with sexualized violence."
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JASON E. YAIVA Submitted by Maxine Wadsworth. Why Maxine would like to honor Jason: "My son refused to hit a young lady even in karate competition. He said everytime he looked at her, he remembered me telling him never to hit a woman or girl. He couldn't hit her but blocked the blows and continued to move toward her until she stepped outside the boundaries."
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To make your own submission to honor a "Man of Strength" in your life who represents the spirit of the counterstory, fill out our submission form.
Other articles from YEAR OF THE COUNTERSTORY:
YEAR OF THE COUNTERSTORY: PROFILES IN STRENGTH
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